Stop-No-Don't

I keep reading stuff by females who are attracted to another female but get scared about what it means. Some don't want to be lesbians. Some don't know if it means they are lesbians. Some care too much about what other people think and so deny themselves the chance to even get to know someone.
=======
Stop-No-Don't
==========
Stop -- please stop
Turn off your eyes - turn off your smile
Don't look so knowing
Please stop -- my fear is growing.

No -- don't talk to me.
No -- you can't call me.
No -- don't walk with me.
No -- I won't meet you.
No -- I don't want to see you.
No -- I haven't been thinking of you.
Well stop dreaming of me - we can never be.
Damn it -- leave me alone!
Please.

Don't send me anymore flowers.
Don't write me.
Don't look at me that way
People will start talking.
No we can't go for a drive.
Don't breathe in my ear.
Don't -- don't touch my face.
Don't call me dear.
Don't -- don't make me want more.
Don't close the door.
No -- don't -- please don't

Don't stop.

WOW !!!

Wonderful
Orgasmic
Mean
Aggravating
Nice

I'll take one.

she her miss ms
caught my eye when she strolled by

she motioned for me to come over but I wouldn't
she smiled one of her rare smiles
she said i almost made her cuss
so i tried again and again and
okay i left her alone

the cashier had cleavage
that i tried not to look down on
blink turn away blink look blink blink look away
well dang, if they are not to be looked upon then why show them
do they need air?

don't get mad at me cause you have on short shorts
anyone looking at you just see skin
ain't nobody looking at your eyes

i glanced at her and she was looking at my -- pair
i smiled and turned so she could get a better -- view
when i asked her to take off her glasses and let me see her eyes
she did it
when i said turn for me
she did it
i never got up the nerve to ask anything else

Wow
Oh wow
More wow
Ahhh wow
Nothing more to say but

WOW!!!

Women Only Women!!!

Sisters Lovers Friends

Women Women Women ...
And a Girl
Span this world

Different every one
But like me
Likes
Women Women Women ...
And a Girl

Faces not seen
Voices not heard
Women Women Women ...
And a Girl/

On the net finding
Sisters - lovers - friends

THEY LOOK

They look at you -- looking at me
And shake their heads'
Cause we're not suppose to be
Happy
Women tisk-tisk-tisk
The men want some of this
What you're giving me
That's all they see
But you're more than a good lay
The fun we have is not just in bed
You fill my heart
You soothe my head
With you I can share
My joy -- my pain
My dreams and my worst nightmares
I know you care
You stand beside me
Through the hell and rain
Times have been hard
But their getting better everyday
My anger and fear faded
When you promised to stay

READY - SET - ...

In this life -- my life
I'll never be a wife
This I know -- this I accept
When I was a girl
I never dreamed of picket fences
Now I'm of age
And feel more comfortable with wrenches
Than pots and pans
I've broken nails and dirty hands
Give me a hammer and saw
I hate cooking and waiting for frozen to thaw
Give me fruit and vegetables
I'll take them raw
I don't need meat
Give me a bean
I'm slimming down
Wanna be lean
Then watch out
I'm going after my dreams
Rip seams -- of my nightmares
Gonna face down the stares
Beware
The vision is more clear
My time is near

A FRIEND

At the moment she's a friend
so i can only treat her as such
i talk to her on the phone as a friend
i ask her out as a friend
she knows i have feelings for her
beyond just a friend
but she is still my friend
because we both need a friend
more than we need a lover

DAUGHTER OF LOVE

She stood in
the rain -- singing
wounded -- yet strong.
Who but Him
heard the pain?
Never hang your
head in shame.
Many don't believe
what the poison-penners
claim. Earth Ambassador
singer of truth
there's a reason
for everything. Many
failed the test of
faith. Keep delivering
the message. Never
question His reason
for making you
A Chosen One.
Come on home
Daughter of love.
----------
NOTE: This goes with a story that I'm working on, so it's not going to make much sense. If I finish and post the story, I will direct you back to this poem. And maybe it will be better understood. This has actually changed some from when I first wrote it. It comes how it comes and I just write or type it. --Salty

I'LL SCREAM LATER

if you think we're wrong
turn me loose and go on home
if we're right
shut your eyes and squeeze me tight
i ain't begging
i ain't forcing
if you're afraid of what you feel
keep denying it's real
go home and cry and dream
i'll scream
later

YEAH !

my mind never clicks off
i don't sleep for days
then for two or three hours
analytical dreams

somedays it takes all my will
just to get out of bed or into bed
i fight depression -- i fight loneliness
i've abstained -- i fight giving up

today -- the same as yesterday -- last year
no job -- no sympathy -- no acceptance -- no warm arms
i have to break out

i'm the odd one -- i don't smoke -- i don't drink
till recently -- i didn't cuss
i can't stand my own foul mouth
maybe i'll try whiskey to numb the pain (nope)
or something else to numb the brain (nope)

you're reading this and thinking
she needs a good ****
YEAH!
but first I need a little good luck
then i could stand on my own
leave mama's castle
build my own kingdom
then i can ***.
----------
NOTE: (Put whatever words you feel comfortable with in place of the stars). I'm in a rut and don't know how I got here. I don't stress about money because I've been with and without it. In midlife, I have money in the bank, the house and car is paid for -- and I owe nobody. I'm less anxious about my wounded heart. I've learned that time will heal it -- if I stop picking at the scab. (I know this doesn't make much sense because I'm only telling bits and pieces.

NOTE: I've abstained means I was celibate, not for religious reasons though. And I' was fighting temptation because I need to be with someone who is ready to be with me, openly. I don't want to be someone's little secret anymore. I thought I had ... okay enough of this, I tell too much.

YOU DECIDE

walking and talking -- sharing and caring
all that is fine
but it's what else i want -- that's crushing my mind
we've always been easy with each other
but now that you're seeing another
i realize -- i want you -- shh! that's taboo
damn it -- my feelings i won't hide
i know you feel something too
what are we gonna do
you haunt my dreams
you decide
tell me i'm nothing more than a friend
that anything else would be a sin
sleepless nights'cause head angels and body demons fight
your lover cares for you -- but not more than i do
many times i've watched you undress
do you really think it would it mean our souls
if you accept my caress
---------
NOTE: I know, another one with the word -- sin -- in it. But some people will not cross that invisible line because they fear going to hell, so they live hell here on earth, in the arms of someone they can't feel.

DON'T SAY GOODBYE

baby don't say goodbye
please -- let's give it another try
you're still in my heart -- my head
i need you -- in my life -- in my bed
i know how cold & lonely the nights can be
i don't want to be free
it took me too long to find you
honey please don't say we're through

on stage -- i have a thousand would be lovers
but not one do i take under the covers
while crooning a love song that i wrote for you -- my muse
i flirt two hours long -- i draw them in
but when it's over -- when the spotlight goes down
i'm on the bus leaving another town
the black tar seems endless
but eventually
it leads me back to your door
i can't promise i won't leave again
but i promise to always return to you.
=====
NOTE: This is for the rock star in me. A certain someone is living my fantasy. Guess who? I even wrote a story about a rock star that might be posted. I do my rocking in the privacy of my bedroom with the door shut and the music turned up loud so that no one can see me sweat or hear me sing. It's great exercise -- rock & roll makes me move.

ALIVE

Every part of my being is alive
Every part has it's own life
My eyes tear to behold
Nose to inhale your fragrance
Breathe wishes to join yours
Lips part to capture another - taste
These - not too muscular arms
Need to draw you near - to embrace
Hands and fingers tingle
Await anxiously to lightly caress
Then not too gently
Shake and search
Legs to weak to stand on
Can wrap strongly around to entrap
The soles of my feet begs for attention
As sensation swiftly travels through my blood
The heart thumps madly
Pounding like it will explode
Stomach quivers as the ache below
Above the knees
Demands relief
We dance to the same wild rhythm
Out of step - a beat ahead
Slow down! make it last!
Can't - the fire is out of control

ON YOUR SHOULDER

Do you remember when
a thunderstorm sent us inside?
We sat on the floor
with our backs against the wall.
I drifted off to sleep
with my head on your shoulder.
Did I talk in my sleep?

Though we seldom see each other
I think of you as a friend.
I never had a crush on you.

Now that you know about me
if the occasion came again
would you let me drift off to sleep
with my head on your shoulder ?

I never had a crush on you
but I think you’re fine.

SECOND CHANCE

You were my sugar-baby
I was the apple of your eye.

I was a fool to leave.

I didn't even say goodbye.

I was a coward not to try.

I remember your smile could invite.

Your kiss burn -- your touch excite.

It's for your love that I yearn.

I know you have another

And I'm jealous as hell.

But it's my fault from your grace I fell.

I've been watching -- waiting -- debating

Should I tell you that your new lover is untrue?

I don't wish to complicate your life.

To bring you more heartache and strife.

No -- I won't tell.

Why should you believe what I say?

I cheated -- I lied -- I treated you the same way.

But I will let you know that I'm around.

And if you should need a shoulder

I'm only across town.

I've got to believe that one day you will trust my heart.

Come around my way -- let me help you make a new start.

A second chance is all I need

To prove I'm now a flower and no longer a weed.

Your heart I will tend, sooth, mend

And baby, I promise to never break again.

But for you -- I will always bend.

---------

NOTE: I don't know where this came from. Maybe it was seeing an ex-GF after many years. The first time, I wouldn't even talk to her. And the second time, we embraced but only briefly. Maybe I wanted her to say some of those things to me.

SHE CRIED

she cried
until she laughed
all her life she'd held it all inside
opening her weary eyes
she saw faces of those
she'd let pass without reaching out
a deep breath
a long sigh
she closed her eyes one last time
a slight smile
she died

I SAID - SHE SAID

I said -- I want you -- she smiled.
I said -- I love you -- she kissed me.

I told my mother -- I want her.
She slapped my face.
I told my mother -- I love her.
She said -- it's a disgrace.
My mother said -- stay away.
I said -- I can't -- I've tried
What I feel can't be denied.
I told my mother -- I need you.
She threw her hands.
I told my mother -- I'm leaving with her.
She didn't understand
She said -- it's a sin -- you're bound for hell.
I said -- I've been burned by the fire
And soothed by the well.
She said -- repent -- give up your sinful ways
It's not too late
I said -- goodbye mother
Wave if you make it through the Pearly Gate.

I COULD FAKE IT

should i -- just pretend
go ahead -- fake it
grin & bare it
real life fairy tale
go ahead -- get married
shake & bake
add another life
sorry i am
i can't do it
not to you -- not to me
i love you enough -- to not continue this sham
you deserve better
i want more
the pros & cons -- i've carefully weighed
we're compatible
except in one MAJOR category
i could fake it
but you would eventually catch on
and end up hating me

THE LOVE WE MAKE

I didn't want his wrath
Or the hell fire
So I was submerged in the blessed pool
But it didn't drown my desire
Or make my blood cool.

I'm lost in your eyes and smile
To be alone -- we drive across the state line
To fine a secluded place
To talk - touch - taste
Not letting a second go to waste

Wishing -- making promises we can't keep
As closer to no turning back we creep
And later acting like we're just friends
When asked where I've been
With my face & heart glowing
I secretly smile and say -- exploring
All the while deep down knowing
The love we make
Is worth the chance we take

I need Him -- I want you
And neither do I forsake
Believing He didn't make a mistake
I love Him and I love you

TO SEE YOU

We're at the top
Of the small town scandal list
I can't stop
I'm swinging with both fist
Baby I'm trying to break through
I'm fighting with all I got
To get - to just - see you

I bought a promise for a dime
And left it at your door
Call me when you've the time
I'll buy you a couple more

I called your number
Cause I needed a friend
Your mama recognized my voice
And began to shout
I asked for you again
That Christian lady
Cussed me out