THE GIRL INSIDE

i know the rumors floated about me.
and I have a pretty good idea where they originated.
a boy -- well yeah -- he grabbed
(activated hormones you know)
(mine hadn't sparked yet)
he pressed his body against mine
at every isolated opportunity
i don't recall kisses
once he got me into his bedroom
and onto his bed
then his twin came in
neither of them actually did much
years later -- he told me"i had you."
i thought and thought and ...
if he did -- i didn't feel it
no male has ever "had me"
if he had put in a little more effort
after i was older
faked caring
maybe he could have "had me"
i had a big question
that he could have helped me answer
but by then i no longer trusted him
many years later
he whispered something naughty
like he was still sixteen
and I started to ask
"why are you whispering
I'm no longer ten?"
why bother responding
that's his mentality
years can pass
but when i see him
the woman knows he's the one
who spread my name, yet
the girl inside
still likes the boy
he'll never know how much
he didn't think he was special
i did.